[Please listen. You can skip the first paragraph if you're busy...]

It's the saddest thing...I think I've become a Feeling person again...And I think its because the hurt I felt is leaving me... (I'm almost sure that me being a T was dependent some way or other on him..)To this day I don't know if I truly allowed that boy to affect me so much... Well, as Brian would say, "do you really think anyone cares about your love life?" and as Brett would answer, "psh, no."
Being a T was very, very nice. I was a healthier person, I even changed my dietary habits...regardless of the fact that I did become, to put it bluntly, FATTER. (SHUT UP, MIKE.) And Mike said that being a T sucked, "one day you'll wake up and find...blah blah a better life/axe murderer", well I'm not sure I feel the same way. I sorta still am the way I became --domineering, headstrong, intolerant, and most of all, just. But you always know you've turned back when you start to cry because of petty things, things that are supposed to be making the other person cry, not you. But you can't help it, you feel for them.
At least I'm not the emo chick I kinda was last yr... too naive.

Looking back on this year, it was a failure. No no no, the year was fine. School was fine. But IT was a failure. Why work so hard to find a few hours of happiness? Why raise yourself so high that at any moment you could fall so hard? Why waste your breath telling everyone? 15 minutes of fame won't get you anywhere.
I don't regret making all those people jealous, they deserved it. Some of them won't ever give up (you're really ugly, by the way), that's too bad. And its wrong how they just throw away those who love them. At least I tried not to (well, maybe not early on ..:-/).

I hope next year the unhealthy ties will be broken. I know I don't want them to, but it really is better if they do. I'll even switch out if I can force myself to.
Go Brasil!